grab the popcorn

So a friend of mine made this bad ass movie about a mutual acquaintance of ours. He already blogged about it, but now I am too. Is that in poor taste? Why don't you go fuck yourself and come up with fresh content like 'erryday. Dick.

Scene: Adam's Morgan, 3AM

pen15 club

Apparently they are huge in Hazelton, PA where I hear there are mad stoners.

Good post? Great post.

Moonlight Skiing

Some of my friends and I have been planning a sick ass ski trip for some time now. Why? Because all the tennis and golf I play are white, but not really white enough. I do also enjoy boating, why do you ask?

Anyhow I'm really hoping I don't end up like our friend here, because, with the well established shrinkage issues found in cold weather climates, I don't want to give ladies the wrong idea.

Portis Pockets Straight

I double dog dare to click that bad boy.

KYS

This is the time of year when everyone comes up with BS resolutions to delude themselves into a false commitment to personal improvement. Here is my advice for your resolution (well not yours per se since you obviously have well above average intelligence since you read the CL; this only applies to people who watch the Hills and other morons sucking up our oxygen):

Why not fucking kill yourself already? (Wow the CL is coming strong with it in '09 son!)

I bring this up since we are in a huge global recession. When resources are scarce, we could use less donkey ass, mouth breathing Cowboy fans sucking up valuable scarce resources. Beast ass logic? Check.

I even got the perfect plan to make your ritual sacrifice make you look kind of badass: glue your hands to your face after you hang a noose made with razorwire. When you jump, the wire cuts your head off but leaves your hands glued on making it look like you tore your own fucking head off. Badass way to go.

I won't even steal it from you since I've got plently of years to go before I end up like this guy, which we all know is more than inevitable.

Happy 2009 fuckers!

Playoffs??

Ah the NFL playoffs are here. This time of year can be tough when your team is sitting at home beacause its so hard to decide who to root for in each game. Do I root for my own division (by far the best in the NFL with 11 Superbowl victories)? Do I root for a friends' team like the Steelers or Dolphins?

I like the idea of the supporting the NFC East but I really hate the shit out of the Eagles. Plus I really like the fact that I can always point to their empty trophy case in the annual shit talking bouts. I can't seem to support the Giants since I think Eli may have down syndrome and none of their players seems likable.

I can't get behind the Ravens (which are kind of local) since their fans are Baltimorons and once punched my friend in the face.

Thus I have decided to back the Arizona Cardinals for the following reason: I have never in my life met a legit Cardinals fan. I won't have to deal with anyone gloating about them winning since I think their 9 fans do not live anywhere near DC. Plus Kurt Warner's wife is hot. Thats just a fact.

May the force be with you.

Because its definitely with this dude, and hes not fucking around: